Third Person Limited Point of View

The Deep Penetration POV

By Mary Rosenblum

 

 

            All right, you’ve decided on third person Point of View for your story – that he, she voice.  This is the most flexible point of view for the purposes of fiction.  You can give us a sense of the character’s voice and thought, as you can in First Person, and you can also sneak in some details that a First Person Point of View might not allow you to include.  So great!  We’re in business.  Maybe.  But…just what is Third Person Limited?  How do you really do it?

 

Climb into My Head

 

          A lot of novice writers are unsure about what Third Person Limited means.  Yes, we use he or she or the person’s name instead of I , but is that all? 

 

            Well, no.  What that limited means is that we are limited to what our POV character sees, hears, smells, tastes, and touches.  In other words, we climb into that character’s head and take a seat behind her eyes.  If the bad guy is sneaking up behind her, we won’t know about it unless she turns around to see him.  If George is thinking that she’s a gorgeous dish, she won’t know it unless George says so out loud.  We are sharing her senses and that is our only access to information in that story world.

 

But Why Not Know Everything?

 

            Yes, you’ve probably written or read the story where we simply peek into any head we want to and see what is going on in the next room, even though the door is closed.  That is called Omniscient Point of View and most novice writers use it because it’s easy.  You want to know that George thinks the character is hot, well, we’ll just overhear his thoughts.  You need to know that the bad guy is stealing her wallet in the bedroom right now?  Well, we’ll just step through that wall and see him!  Hey, we have X-ray vision, we can be anywhere, know everything.  Cool, huh? 

 

            Well, not really.  Because if we can do all those things, then we are NOT our character.  And if you think about the stories that have really stuck with you, the ones you really remember, you probably found yourself living the story along with the character.  And to do that, we have to see and hear with our character.  If we are limited to the normal range of human senses, then we feel that we are a real person in a real world.  If we are Superman, we are reminded that this is not a real world.  You don’t just look into your neighbor’s head in the real world.  (Well, I can’t.  I don’t know about your skill set! J)  So if we behave in a way that we cannot do in the real world, then we are constantly reminded that this is just a made up story, not real.  And the more we forget that it’s a story, the more we believe we are living a real adventure with real people, he more powerful that story becomes.

 

             Don’t remind us it isn’t real! 

 

            So how do we do that?  Well, let’s take Anne.  She is coming home from work. 

 

            Anne unlocked the door and flung it open.  That stupid Elaine.  How could she have forgotten to order fries?  Anne stripped off her greasy apron and threw it across the sofa.  They’d run short for sure tomorrow and Mr. Donnell would blame her.  She stomped across the living room and clicked on the kitchen light.  Peanut butter smeared the counter and flies buzzed on an open jar of grape jelly.  A popsicle melted into an orange puddle on the table.  Peter was home.  Anne sighed and grabbed the sponge.  The doorbell rang and she froze, the sponge dripping as she clenched her fist. 

 

            Look at what we have here.  We fling that door open with Anne.  We overhear her thoughts because we’re sitting inside her head.  Elaine has made a mistake and her boss will blame her.  She doesn’t think about who her boss is or Elaine or even where she works.  She knows all this.  Why should she tell herself where she works?  But we guess it’s a fast food joint from the fries and the apron.

 

            We stomp with her across the living room.  We know her mood from her thoughts and her actions.  She doesn’t tell us, because again, she knows she’s tired and grumpy.   The author doesn’t need to.  We get it! 

 

            In the kitchen, we see peanut butter on the counter and the melting popsicle.  We don’t know Peter is her son, but we’re probably going to assume that he is from her reaction to the mess of food.  This is a usual occurrence and probably made by a kid.

 

            The doorbell rings.  We know this startles her because she clenches her fist.  But we don’t know who is there any more than she does.  We can’t see the ex-husband with murder in his eyes, or the boyfriend she thought was mad at her with flowers, or the Postman with a registered letter informing her she has inherited a million dollars.  You may want us to see that coming, but you can’t show us without dragging us roughly out of her head and shoving us out into the yard.  And then you have broken our growing intimacy with her AND you have reminded us that we are not living this scene, that we are a ghostly superman who can be anywhere and really isn’t in this world.

 

            Not good. Sit on your impatience and let us hurry to the front door with her, then try to slam it as Fred shoves his way inside, or that boyfriend peers sheepishly through the storm door with the pink roses in his arms, or the Postman taps his foot impatiently with the registered letter in his hands….   We’ll find out who is there at exactly the same moment she finds out. 

 

            That is how it happens in the real world!  And that is where Limited Third Person POV puts us…into the real world of your story. 

 

Getting Information to the Reader

 

          But wait, you say!  I really want the reader to see how much her boyfriend cares about her.  I need to put the reader into his head so that he can overhear him think about how gorgeous she looks and how much he loves her.  It’s important.  The story needs that.

 

            Well, okay, we can let the reader find out that he loves her.  We can figure out things that our POV doesn’t tumble to.  She can be oblivious for a host of reasons, but we don’t need to peek into the boyfriend’s head in order to do this!  We’ll let him show her, and even if she doesn’t get it, we will.  So how do we do this? 

 

            “Oh, come in.”  Anne  pulled the door open with a sigh. “Roses!  Oh, Bret, you’re sweet, but you can’t afford roses.  Not this time of year.”  She took them from him and sighed.  “We just had a fight, and it was mostly me.  I’m just so tired these days.”

            “It’s not because of the fight.”  Bret follower her as she went into the kitchen to find a vase. 

            “Don’t come in.  It’s a mess.”  She laughed, exasperated, as he pinned her against the sink, his arms around her.

            “I don’t care if it’s a mess.  I care about you.  Anne, you can’t keep on like this.  I’m worried about you.  And.. I love you.”

            She froze.  He had never used that word before.  “I…Let me put these in water.”  She turned away and he let her, his arms falling to his side.

 

            Okay, what do we see here.  We see Bert who really seems to be worried about her, brings her roses not as a make-up gesture, but trying to do something to lift her spirits, who says right out that he is worried about her an loves her.  And she resists those words.  They bother her for some reason.  But the reader believes him.  He loves her.  And this is her POV.  She sees his expression, hears his words, knows he is following her into the kitchen, but we never know what he is thinking.  She makes her assumption from his words, and we make our assumptions from his words.  They may not be the same assumption but that’s how it is in real life. 

 

            Yes, I could have said, Bret stared at her, thinking that she looked tired. Gosh, he loved her so much! He just wanted the best for her, but she couldn’t let herself believe that he really loved her.   

 

            Now that takes fewer words, so isn’t it better?  No.  Not only have we broken our reader out of Anne’s head, but Bret is telling us what is going on.  In the first example we figured it out on our own.  When we let the reader figure it out, it seems much more real to the reader. What do you remember best…something you learned by doing, or something someone told you?  Take the time to stay in your main character’s POV and let us discover what we need to know for ourselves.  It may take more work, but it’s well worth it!